Vic Roads and the Muppets within!

Vic Roads and the Muppets within!


Last Tuesday the  24th  May at 3.30 pm the following took place.

Whilst driving my car west, out of Melbourne on the west gate freeway toward the Westgate Bridge, I noticed that the traffic was exceptionally heavy for that time of day. I couldn’t understand why, at that time of day and immediately suspected that a breakdown or accident might be involved, that, or once again they had road works taking place.

I had jumped onto the freeway at the old WTC entrance and some 30 minutes later, I had come to be beside the cause of all the dramas. There, parked on top of the west gate bridge in the outer lane was a broken down Toyota Celica, actually, I had a flat front tyre and the lady was still inside the car.

Park right behind the broken down car was one of those rather large Vic Road emergency response / breakdown vans, and there, sitting quite comfortably in his driver seat was the operator of the van, all warm and cosy in his vehicle, lights flashing and the arrow directing traffic into the other lanes.

Now I was rather surprised that he was not attempting to change the tyres on the car for the lady, I mean, this could quite easily have been accomplished by parking his van over about another meter or two, I mean, its not like it would have made much difference to the already exceedingly crappy state of the traffic now is it. That would have protected both him and the other car, whilst he helped her on her way.

I decided to contact Vic roads and after having established contact with a young lady there was TOLD that no managers were available to speak with me as they were all OUT ON THE ROAD!

If you had seen my face, she was a lucky lady, I informed her I was not stupid and that there was not a snowflakes chance in hell that ALL THE VIC ROADS MANAGERS WOULD BE OUT ON THE ROAD AND TO GET ME SOMEBODY IN CHARGE! this time, I had indeed raised my voice and was about ready to verbally slap her to death.

I was transferred to some sort of operational control room and then managed to speak with a gentleman who was well aware what was going on.

After asking him why the VAN driver had not changed the tyre and if indeed it was as simple as a flat tyre, to which I was told yes, he then gave me the following explanation.

The VAN ( Vic Roads), had arrived shortly after the noticed that the young lady had stopped on the top of the Bridge ( westgate) with the flat.

The VAN driver ( Vic Roads Road service and EMERGENCY BBREAKDOWN TECHNICIAN) checked, conformed and then called the RACV. As they would only be about 10 minutes and…..WAIT FOR IT PEOPLE..AND because the car was on a slight angle with the bridge and he felt it might fall off the jack. They thought the risk was best placed onto the RACV.

Well. The RACV didn’t arrive in 15 minutes, the tech, who happens to be trained and giess what..ITS HIS FUCKING JOB, chose to sit on his fat arse in the van, fuck up all the afternoon traffic existing from the Melbourne CBD all because the CAR was on an Angle and he didn’t feel like changing a tyre.


That’s why folks we have mega expensive VAN, with all manner of breakdown and emergency gear in it, A very highly trained technician I have no doubt, but one, WHO is a lazy as FK and would rather fuck up thousands of Melbournians rather than GET off his arse, or in this case, OUT of his van and DO SOME FUCKING WORK!.

And now I notice, that Vic Roads is being slapped by an independany audit, they cannot organise a piss up in a brewery, lets remember, these are the people who Project Manage ( what I do for a living BTW), the install of those safety wire rope rails, only to rip out great sections later on, as they are NOW widening the road. DERRRR, how about waiting until the road is widened…THEN in stall the barriers…BUT NO!…NO!…its better to WASTE taxpayers money.

Dick heads..populated with DICKHEADS


6 thoughts on “Vic Roads and the Muppets within!

  1. Be warned, I am so fkn angry, I could not be bothered going back, fixing the grammatical errors and typos…JUST DEAL WITH IT!

  2. I have another Vic Roads story. Mate just moved here from Qld (yeah, another one… deal with it) and noticed her rego was about 4 weeks out from expiring. Decided she’d better get the forms filled out to transfer over to Vic plates. Simple process, was the thought process – possible an internet form, at worst a lodge-at-the-Post-Office job (accompanied by the obligatory ass-raping fee, naturally) and Bob’s your confused cousin…

    Oh no, that’s not how you supposedly fkn sophistimacated Victimatorians do it. You must first Book An Appointment with a Consultant! Now, before you even let your mind wander into what type of career path one must be on to find oneself as a Changing Registration Plates from Queensland To Victorian CONSULTANT, know that this person/s are EXTREMELY BUSY. So much so that a 7 WEEK WAITING PERIOD WAS IN FORCE. Yep, friend was without car for 3 weeks.

    Victoria… The Garden State. Yeah, you’re fkn smokin it.

  3. In response to the above, one would be left without any doubt that you are a fwitt. It’s a shame that someone in a smirk, important job such as you’rs was delayed due to a member of the public breaking down. It’s idiots such as yourself that feel the need to express an opionion on everything, without neither the knowledge or skill to back it up. Next time instead of having a cry, how about you personally stop, get out of you’re vehicle and change the tyre in traffic. Sure you would be risking your life in doing so, but as a project manager lol I’m sure you will get it done. Stop being a little bitch and don’t comment on things that you quite clearly have no real understanding about.

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